Passover 2020 By Avital Kadosh Made with Haggadot.com - Temple Sinai New Orleans
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Passover 2020 By Avital Kadosh Made with Haggadot.com
Table of Contents Introduction Quick Seder Plate Guide The Sorting Hat of Passover Pesach Coloring Page Map of the Exodus Seder Guests... Kadesh Take Us Out of Egypt Urchatz Wash Your Hands song Karpas Karpas Buzzfeed style quiz Yachatz Pharaoh Doesn't Pay Maggid - Beginning Passover Play - a ten minute script for all ages -- Four Questions The Four Questions Dr. Seuss' Four Questions Hunger Seder: Four Questions Mazon's Fifth Question (2019) Four Questions Asked in Sarcasm -- Four Children Pesah Man (Sing to tune of Piano Man) Emoji Four children Reggae Four Children: No Egypt, No Cry! Jewish Identity The Good Place - 4 Children
The Four Janets -- Exodus Story Exodus Story - Drawing Activity Matzah Humor The Story of Passover (Script) The Passover Story for Kids Let My People Go (song) -- Ten Plagues Dom, Dom Skit - Pharaoh and Moses Go To A Conflict Counselor -- Cup #2 & Dayenu dayeinu graph We're Gonna Sing Dayenu (Sing to tune of We Didn't Start the Fire) Maroon 5/Adam Levine - "Memories (The 2nd Cup Parody Song)" Rachtzah Because we would feel guilty if we didn't Modern Passover Motzi-Matzah Seder Matzo Joke No Pasta more Matzah Maror Embody the Bitterness Maror Maror Maror: Bitterness Maror (Bitter Herbs) by Hanan Harchol Shulchan Oreich Passover Around The World Trivia Tzafun Afikomen Prize
Hallel Heschel on Kindness Nirtzah Next Year in Jerusalem! Conclusion Ben & Jerry's Rejected Passover Flavors Be Our Guest, Elijah Commentary / Readings Jokes for Kids: The best clean Pesach jokes I've found Songs Take Me Out to the Seder A Whole New World Passover Parody Chag Gad Ya Emoji Style Games "Jews" (Juice by Lizzo)
Introduction Quick Seder Plate Guide Contributed by Zvi Bellin Source: Original Moishe House (www.moishehouse.org) worked with educators from JewishLearning.com to create this awesome quick guide to your Seder plate!
Introduction
The Sorting Hat of Passover
Contributed by Cantor fbg
Source: Original
The Sorting Hat of Passover
You might belong in Gryffindor where dwell the brave at heart. They forge the
path for those to come with justice, tzedek, from the start!
You might belong in Hufflepuff where they are just and loyal. Those patient ‘Puffs are true and
unafraid of Middle Eastern turmoil!
Or yet in wise old Ravenclaw if you’ve a ready mind. Where those of wit and learning will
always find chevruta in kind.
Or perhaps in Slytherin you’ll make your real friends. Those cunning folks use any sources to
achieve their Talmudic ends.
Though I must fulfill my duty and must divide the table every year; still I wonder whether
sorting may not bring the end I fear. Oh, know the Bible, read the Siddur, the warning with
which history is fraught. For our Seder is in danger from external deadly thought! And we must
stay united or we’ll crumble from within; I have told you, I have warned you, let the Jewish
learning begin!
Introduction Pesach Coloring Page Contributed by Haggadot Source: Haggadot.com
Introduction Map of the Exodus Contributed by Rachel Luxemburg Source:
Introduction Seder Guests... Contributed by Rebecca Powell Source: Seder Guests To the tune of “Matchmaker” Seder guests, seder guests lend me your ear We’ve all arrived Another year Seder guests, seder guests look in your book Tonight we drink wine, not beer. For Papa, please pay attention For Mama, get through all of the steps. For me, well, I wouldn’t mention If matzah ball soup was just all we get Seder guests, seder guests, mah nishtanah? Let us find out What Israelites saw. We tell the story to the little ones… So…let’s do Kadesh Next step urchatz When do we eat? That parts the best Our seder has now begun!
Kadesh Take Us Out of Egypt Contributed by Sarah Wisnia Source: http://holidays.juda.com/passover-songs.shtml Take Us out of Egypt (sung to the tune of Take me out to the ball game") Take us out of Egpyt Free us from slavery Bake us some matzah in a haste Don't worry 'bout flavor--Give no thought to taste. Oh it's rush, rush, rush, to the Red Sea If we don't cross it's a shame For it's ten plagues, Down and you're out At the Pessah history game.
Urchatz Wash Your Hands song Contributed by Dvora Ferrell Source: http://www.templerodefshalom.org/wp-content/uploads/2013/02/2013-SederSongs1.pdf I Want to Wash My Hands to the tune of “I Want to Hold Your Hand” by The Beatles Oh yeah, I’ll tell you something It’s one of God’s commands When you start the Seder You need to wash your hands You need to wash your hands You need to wash your hands Oh my what a feeling Before the paschal lamb And yes it’s appealing I want to wash my hands I want to wash my hands I want to wash my hands And we wash them when we say the Barchu I pass the bowl around and say On to you, on to you, on to you Yeah, You got us praying To reach the Promised Land Hear this we’re conveying We want to wash our hands We want to wash our hands We want to wash our hands ©2013 David Vanca and Lizzy Pike
Karpas Karpas Buzzfeed style quiz Contributed by KDS Students 2019 Source:
Yachatz Pharaoh Doesn't Pay Contributed by Zeth Weissman [To the tune of "I've Been Working on the Railroad"] We've been working on these buildings; Pharaoh doesn't pay. We've been doing what he tells us Mixing the straw with the clay Can't you hear the master calling, "Hurry up, make that brick!" Can't you feel the master whip us 'Til we're feeling sick. Oy vay, it's a mess, a terrible distress, Oy vey, it's a mess for Jews, us Jews Oy vay, it's a mess, a terrible distress, Oy vey, it's a mess for Jews. Moshe's in the palace with Pharaoh, Warning of all God's clout, clout, clout, clout. Moshe's in the palace with Pharaooooooooooh, And God's gonna get us out! We're singing... Fee, fi, fiddely eye oh, Make our Matzahs "to go" oh oh oh. Fee, fi, fiddely eye oooooooooh, Stick it to the ol' Pharaoh!
Maggid - Beginning Passover Play - a ten minute script for all ages Contributed by Rabbi Daniel Brenner Source: Rabbi Daniel Brenner, www.rabbidanielbrenner.blogspot.com Here is a kid and adult friendly alternative to for the Maggid section (the Passover story section) of the Haggadah. This short play is in the style of "sedra scenes" -- a contemporary take which makes the story current but stays true to the Exodus narrative. I've written it for large crowds -- so there are 13 parts, but if you have a smaller gathering you can easily double up. LET MY PEOPLE GO! A short play for the seder CAST: NARRATOR, JOSEPH, BENJAMIN, PHAROAH, ADVISOR, HEBREW 1, HEBREW 2, HEBREW 3, BOSS, BAT PHAROAH, MOSES, GOD, AARON (13 parts) NARRATOR: Our story begins in the land of Egypt where Joseph, once a prisoner, is now the Pharaoh’s chief advisor. JOSEPH: So how are things back in Israel? BENJAMIN: Oy! Terrible. Our gardens and crops are dying. There is no rain this year. That is why we had to come down to Egypt! JOSEPH: Well, don’t worry..life in Egypt is fantastic. Playstation 3 in every house, High Definition Television, Lincoln Navigators in the driveway, This is the most powerful nation on the planet! BENJAMIN: Did you have rain this year? Are the gardens and crops doing well? JOSEPH: We don’t have to worry about that. I’ve stored away tons of food in giant warehouses. The Pharaoh will be able to feed the people for three years at least, even if we get no rain. BENJAMIN: What does the Pharaoh think of us Hebrews? JOSEPH: He loves me. He welcomes the Hebrews into his land. Bring the entire family, we’ll make a great life here. Narrator: The Hebrews all moved to Egypt and had many children and lived a successful life. But after many years, after Joseph and his brothers had died, a new Pharaoh rose to power.
PHAROAH: Advisor, bring me the latest census report. I want to know all the people who I rule over! ADVISOR: Yes, you’re Royal Highness. I have the numbers here. PHAROAH: Let’s see..Nubians, Midians, yes, very good. Are there really that many Hebrews? ADVISOR: Oh yes, your highness. They are growing in number. They are very strong workers. PHAROAH: Do you think that might be a danger? Perhaps they will challenge my rule – make demands. You know how these workers are always complaining about the size of the rocks for the new Pyramids. I am worried that they will use their strength in numbers to rise up against me! ADVISOR: Yes, you are right, we must do something to break their spirits. PHAROAH: First, let us begin with something small. We’ll get them to make more bricks each day. If that doesn’t work, we’ll eliminate the fifteen-minute breaks. If that doesn’t break them, then maybe we’ll turn to harsher measures. Narrator: The Hebrew workers struggled to keep up with Pharaoh’s demands. HEBREW 1: My hands are killing me. And my back, oy! I can’t take this pace. HEBREW 2: We can make a thousand bricks a day—but two thousand? No team can work that hard! We’ll fall over! HEBREW 3: Get back to work, the boss is coming! BOSS: Efficiency, people! We have got to make 900 more bricks by sundown! Come on, let’s work faster! HEBREW 1: We are working as fast as we can, boss. BOSS: Listen, smart aleck, I’ve got a lot of pressure on my shoulders. If Pharaoh doesn’t get his bricks, I’m out of a job. I got a family to feed, too, you know. So get back down in the pit and start working! HEBREW 2: We haven’t had a break all day! BOSS: And you are not going to get one! Work! HEBREW 3: You know what, boss; you have become a real pain in the backside! BOSS: What’d you say?
HEBREW 3: You heard me. [The BOSS walks over and pushes Hebrew 3 to the ground] BOSS: Now get back to work before I get really angry! Narrator: Meanwhile, Pharaoh’s daughter adopted a young Hebrew child. The child, Moses, was raised with the finest Egypt had to offer. BAT PHAROAH: Here, sweetheart, eat your honey cakes before your flute lesson. MOSES: I’m so excited about the party this evening. BAT PHAROAH: Your new robe looks lovely, dear. I just hope that the Pyramid is finished. Your grandfather has the workers working double time just to get the place finished before the great assembly. MOSES: I heard that the Hebrews were complaining. BAT PHAROAH: Complaining? Don’t worry about that. We take care of the needs of all our workers, dear. They are fed, given homes, and we give them a new pair of shoes each year. We are very generous. The only problem is that there are simply too many Hebrews. For that reason, we are cutting down their number. I know that it is sad that we have to kill off their baby boys, but we are really doing it for their own good. MOSES: I know so little about the world. Someday I’d like to go out of the palace and see how they live. BAT PHAROAH: They are not clean like us, dear. Especially the Hebrews. They throw garbage on the streets, and the smells are truly horrible. Narrator: One day Moses decides to sneak out of the palace, and see for himself the plight of the Hebrews. HEBREW 1: I can’t work, today, I’m sick! And I hurt my arm yesterday lifting stones! BOSS: I don’t want to hear excuses. This pyramid has got to be finished by Thursday! Today is Wednesday! So get moving! HEBREW 1: I can’t work. Please, listen to me, have some compassion! HEBREW 2: Give him a break, boss! BOSS: Shut up! HEBREW 3: Don’t get involved!
HEBREW 2: I’m tired of this, boss! My cousin there is hurt. He can’t work today. And he’s not working. So go tell Pharaoh that he’ll have to hire some more workers or this isn’t getting done! BOSS: Shut up! [Boss pushes Hebrew 2 to the ground.] HEBREW 1: Stop it! BOSS: I’m going to hurt you bad, you whiny Hebrew! HEBREW 3: Stop! One of Pharaoh’s princes is coming! MOSES: What is happening? BOSS: I am going to give this man the beating he deserves, your honor! Watch this! MOSES: No! [Moses hits the Boss, who falls to the ground] HEBREW 3: Oh no! What did you do to the boss? We’ll be blamed for this! We’ll be punished! MOSES: What have I done? What have I done? Narrator: Moses ran away, far off into the wilderness. Where he is taken in by Yitro, and marries one of Yitro’s daughter’s Zipporah. One day, as Moses is taking care of yitro’s sheep, he stumbles across a burning bush. GOD: Moses, Moses! MOSES: Who is that? What is going on? What is happening? GOD: It is me, the God of your ancestors, Abraham, Issac, and Jacob. MOSES: You must have the wrong number. GOD: This is no time for jokes. You must go back to Egypt and stand up to Pharaoh! Then you will lead the people back to their homeland! MOSES: How will I do that? The people do not know me! I have no power now that I have run away! GOD: I will be with you. Go to your sister, Miriam, and brother, Aaron, and stand up to Pharaoh!
Narrator: Moses returns to Egypt, with his wife and son, Gershom. Aaron and Moses approach Pharaoh. PHAROAH: What do you want? AARON: Our people need a three-day vacation. We need to go outside of the city so that we can pray to God in our own way. PHAROAH: Why can’t you wait for the festival of the pyramids? Then your people will have a chance to celebrate with everyone. MOSES: We do not wish to pray to your gods. We have one God, who is mightier than all of your gods. PHAROAH: You must be joking. The gods have made Egypt a great nation. What has your God done for you? MOSES: You’ll see what our God can do! And then you’ll give in to our demands! PHAROAH: Don’t count on it, Hebrew! Narrator: Pharaoh was a stubborn man. Even after plagues of blood, frogs, lice, disease, hail, and darkness, he would not let the Hebrews take a day off. It wasn’t until a disease struck and killed the first born of every Egyptian, that the Pharaoh changed his mind. PHAROAH: Don’t you understand what is happening? ADVISOR: No, your highness, I don’t know why our gods are not protecting us. PHAROAH: Everything we did to the Hebrews is now happening to us!!! ADVISOR: Maybe their God is powerful! PHAROAH: Tell the police that are surrounding their neighborhood to let them go. Narrator: That night, Moses, spoke to the people. MOSES: Put on your sandals, we will not have time to bake the bread for tomorrow! Tonight we will leave Egypt, and set out for a new land! Our children, and our children’s children will remember this night! They will tell the story of how we stood up to Pharaoh, and how God helped us to be free! AARON: Let all who are hungry come and eat! Narrator: And thus ends our little play.
-- Four Questions
The Four Questions
Contributed by JewishBoston
Source: JewishBoston.com
The formal telling of the story of Passover is framed as a discussion with lots of questions and
answers. The tradition that the youngest person asks the questions reflects the centrality of
involving everyone in the seder. The rabbis who created the set format for the seder gave us the
Four Questions to help break the ice in case no one had their own questions. Asking questions is
a core tradition in Jewish life. If everyone at your seder is around the same age, perhaps the
person with the least seder experience can ask them – or everyone can sing them all together.
שַׁתּנָּה ַהַֽלּיְָלה ַהזֶּה ִמָכּל ַהֵלּילות
ְ ִַמה נּ
Ma nishtana halaila hazeh mikol haleilot?
Why is this night different from all other nights?
שְׁבָּכל ַהֵלּילוֹת ָֽאנוּ אוֹכלין ָחֵמץ וַּמָצּה ַהַֽלּיְָלה ַהזֶּה ֻכּלּוֹ מצה
ֶ
Shebichol haleilot anu ochlin chameitz u-matzah. Halaila hazeh kulo matzah.
On all other nights we eat both leavened bread and matzah.
Tonight we only eat matzah.
שׁאָר יְָרקוֹת ַהַֽלּיְָלה ַהזֶּה ָמרוֹר
ְ שְׁבָּכל ַהֵלּילוֹת ָֽאנוּ אוְֹכִלין
ֶ
Shebichol haleilot anu ochlin shi’ar yirakot haleila hazeh maror.
On all other nights we eat all kinds of vegetables,
but tonight we eat bitter herbs.
שֵׁתּי ְפעמים
ְ שְׁבָּכל ַהֵלּילוֹת ֵאין ָֽאנוּ ַמְטִבּיִלין ֲאִפילוּ ַֽפַּעם אָחת ַהַֽלּיְָלה ַהזֶּה
ֶ
Shebichol haleilot ain anu matbilin afilu pa-am echat. Halaila hazeh shtei fi-amim.
On all other nights we aren’t expected to dip our vegetables one time.
Tonight we do it twice.
ַהַֽלּיְָלה ַהזֶּה ֻכָּֽלּנוּ ְמֻסבין: . שִׁבין וֵּבין ְמֻסִבּין
ְ שְׁבָּכל ַהֵלּילוֹת ָֽאנוּ אוְֹכִלין ֵבּין יוֹ
ֶ
Shebichol haleilot anu ochlin bein yoshvin uvein m’subin. Halaila hazeh kulanu m’subin.
On all other nights we eat either sitting normally or reclining.
Tonight we recline.-- Four Questions
Dr. Seuss' Four Questions
Contributed by Guy Mann
Source: www.acs.ucalgary.ca/~elsegal/Uncle_Eli/Eli.html
The Four Questions and cake with six layers
and windows and doors.
Why is it only Yes--
on Passover night on all other nights
we never know how we eat all kinds of bread,
to do anything right? but tonight of all nights
We don't eat our meals we munch matzo instead.
in the regular ways,
the ways that we do And on all other nights
on all other days. we devour
vegetables, green things,
'Cause on all other nights and bushes and flowers,
we may eat lettuce that's leafy
all kinds of wonderful and candy-striped spinach,
good bready treats, fresh silly celery
like big purple pizza (Have more when you're finished!)
that tastes like a pickle, cabbage that's flown
crumbly crackers from the jungles of Glome
and pink pumpernickel, by a polka-dot bird
sassafras sandwich who can't find his way home,
and tiger on rye, daisies and roses
fifty felafels in pita, and inside-out grass
fresh-fried, and artichoke hearts
with peanut-butter that are simply first class!
and tangerine sauce Sixty asparagus tips
spread onto each side served in glasses
up-and-down, then across, with anchovy sauce
and toasted whole-wheat bread and some sticky molasses--
with liver and ducks, But on Passover night
and crumpets and dumplings, you would never consider
and bagels and lox, eating an herb
and doughnuts with one hole that wasn't all bitter.
and doughnuts with four,And on all other nights And on all other nights
you would probably flip we can sit as we please,
if anyone asked you on our heads, on our elbows,
how often you dip. our backs or our knees,
On some days I only dip or hang by our toes
one Bup-Bup egg from the tail of a Glump,
in a teaspoon of vinegar or on top of a camel
mixed with nutmeg, with one or two humps,
but sometimes we take with our foot on the table,
more than ten thousand tails our nose on the floor,
of the Yakkity-birds with one ear in the window
that are hunted in Wales, and one out the door,
and dip them in vats doing somersaults
full of Mumbegum juice. over the greasy k'nishes
Then we feed them to Harold, or dancing a jig
our six-legged moose. without breaking the dishes.
Or we don't dip at all! Yes--
We don't ask your advice. on all other nights
So why on this night you sit nicely when dining--
do we have to dip twice? So why on this night
must it all be reclining?-- Four Questions Hunger Seder: Four Questions Contributed by MAZON: Source: Mazon: Hunger Seder The Four Questions we ask at our Hunger Seder challenge us to consider what is different about this night. Only when we ask the right questions can we understand the causes of hunger and take action to end this unnecessary plight. 1. Why during this seder do we focus on hunger? Hunger remains a painful physical reality for far too many of our friends, neighbors, and family members. Hunger is an oppressive force that holds individuals back from realizing their full potential in life and limits our society from making greater progress. The Passover seder celebrates liberation from bondage and the joy of freedom. But in communities across our country, millions of Americans struggle to put enough nutritious food on the table and are bound by the hardships of their circumstances. As long as Americans continue to struggle with food insecurity, we will continue to dedicate this Hunger Seder to the goal of ending hunger and its causes. 2. Why isn’t it better for local charities to feed people, instead of the government? Charitable organizations — including MAZON’s nationwide partners on the front lines — are not set up to feed every hungry person in their communities. Food pantries and soup kitchens were created to provide support during temporary or emergency situations, not to solve systemic problems. Many are open only a few days a week and for a few hours of each day. They are largely volunteer run, often out of basements or closets at their local houses of worship, and they primarily distribute food that has been donated from within their communities. They simply could never have the capacity to feed the number of people who need help. Government nutrition programs, on the other hand, have the ability to help millions of people get the food they need to lead healthy lives. 3. What are the costs of hunger for our country? Being hungry can be all-consuming and distracting, which in turn decreases productivity in working adults and negatively impacts the ability for unemployed individuals to find work. Seniors are particularly vulnerable when it comes to food insecurity and face serious health risks from nutritional deficiencies. Without sufficient food and proper nutrition, children are at a much greater risk for developmental problems, chronic health conditions, and poor academic performance, and face reduced prospects for economic and professional achievement later in life. The many personal costs of hunger are magnified at the national level. Bread for the World Institute estimated in its 2016 Hunger Report that hunger and food insecurity increased health expenditures in the United States by $160 billion in the previous year alone, largely due to preventable diet-related chronic diseases. In both the short and long term, having a substantial population of people struggling with hunger impedes our country’s economic prosperity for everyone.
4. How could so many individuals and families still suffer from hunger when we live in a
society of tremendous wealth?
The best adjective to accurately describe the amount of food available in the United States is
abundant. Yet food insecurity affects more than 1 out of every 8 men, women, and children in
America. Hunger persists in this country not because of a lack of food, but because of a lack of
political will. Now is the time to act and ensure that all people have access to affordable,
nutritious food.
Mazon's Fifth Question (2019)
Contributed by MAZON:
Source: Mazon: Hunger Seder
Each year at the Seder, we ask the traditional Four Questions. And each year, MAZON asks a
Fifth Question to raise awareness about a particular hunger-related issue and spark important
conversations around the seder table. This year, we turn our attention to our seniors, who are
aging into poverty and hunger at a rapid rate. Why is it that when we talk about aging in
America, we never talk about hunger?
Why is this time of life different from all other times of life?
Hunger among Americans 60 and older is a growing crisis. One in seven seniors lives in poverty,
and 4.9 million seniors struggle with hunger. SNAP is a lifeline for seniors, but many older
Americans are not receiving this vital assistance. Three out of five seniors who are eligible for
SNAP do not participate, meaning millions of seniors are missing out due to shame, stigma, and
difficulty accessing services.
Why is it so hard to be older in America? Why are so many seniors aging into poverty? On
this night, we honor our elders, our ancestors, and those who came before us. On all other
nights, how is it that we allow seniors to go hungry?
How can we fail to respond when our elders are suffering? Tonight, we ask how we can change
the reality for the 4.9 million seniors who are struggling with hunger
LEADER: Our tradition demands that we ask questions, challenge the status quo, and work to
create a more fair and equitable society. We were slaves, but now we are free. And with our
freedom comes the responsibility to work for justice and freedom for all.
Avadim hayinu Ata b’nai chorin.
We were slaves – now we are free.-- Four Questions
Four Questions Asked in Sarcasm
Contributed by Jeff Cohen
Source:
FOUR QUESTIONS [asked in sarcasm with big eye rolls]
Like seriously why is this night like soooo different from all the other nights? They’re just
nights.
• Like seriously why is it – are you kidding me? - that like on all the other nights – every
single night – all the time – we eat either leavened bread or matza – no, we don’t but, if
that’s like what you want to believe than fine, go ahead - , but on this night we eat only
matza plus a bunch of other stuff that’s mostly disgusting?
• Like seriously why – are you joking? - is it that on all other nights we eat all kinds of
vegetables – ya, right, in your parent dreams - but on this night we eat bitter herbs – and
it’s super hot like wasabi or something?
• Like seriously why is it that on all other nights we do not dip [our food] even once except
when we are eating French fries & ketchup or any other of about ten zillion situations,
but on this night we dip them twice like we’re robots or something?
• Like seriously why is it that on all other nights we dine either sitting upright or reclining
which is so not true because when we slouch you get like sooooo mad at us, but ya, sure
if that’s what you want to believe, just go ahead, and fine and so on this night we all like
just recline – even though I am reading this sitting straight up and you are all sitting there
just listening and like none of you are reclining not even a little but whatever?-- Four Children Pesah Man (Sing to tune of Piano Man) Contributed by Eli Garfinkel Source: Rabbi Eli Garfinkel It’s eight o’clock on a festive eve The Haggadah sons shuffle past They are wise, and wicked, and simpleton And one who doesn’t know how to ask The wise son says “Dad, wontcha call on me.” I know the Torah and the codes They’re good and they’re sweet And I know ‘em complete The others might as well take a doze. La-di-die-diddy-die. . . Sing us a song you’re the Pesah man Sing us a song tonight Well we’re all in the mood for a macaroon And you’ve got us feeling alright. The wicked son curses: “bleep bleep bleep” If he’d been there he’d have died And he’s quick with a poke or to tell a bad joke And if his lips are moving it’s a lie He says, “Dad I believe this is killing me.” As a smile grew big on his face “Well I’m sure that I could be a movie star If I could get out of this place. Low the third of the sons is a simple guy Neither a dolt nor Einstein He’s simply gonna ask So we’ll answer, no task And I think that’s really just fine. And the fourth of the sons really has no clue He can’t even get the words out So we’ll tell him the story We won’t make it real boring I don’t see us needing to shout. La-di-die-diddy-die. . . Sing us a song you’re the Pesah man Sing us a song tonight Well we’re all in the mood for a macaroon And you’ve got us feeling alright.
-- Four Children Emoji Four children Contributed by Hannah Dow Source:
-- Four Children Reggae Four Children: No Egypt, No Cry! Contributed by Rabbi Nadav Caine (Sung to the tune of Bob Marley's "No Woman No Cry" with lyrics by Rabbi Nadav Caine. Guitar chords are verses C-G-Am-F and chorus is C-G-Am-F then C-F-C-G.) No, Egypt, no cry (4x) The wise one asks, "What are the laws that God requires of thee?" Tell him there's a Seder, and an Afikomen, and in between we eat! The wicked one says, “What's this mean to you”? But not “to me”! The simple one adds, “What's this mean at all?" The fourth stares silently. No Egypt No Cry (4x) Said, I remember when we used to build Towers and roads in Egypt Oppression hurt like a bitter herb, Our taskmasters they beat us.. Good friends we have, oh, good friends we've lost Along the way In this great future, you can't forget your past So dry your tears, I say No, Egypt, no cry No, Egypt, no cry 'Ere, little darlin', don't shed no tears No, woman, no cry Said, God freed us, helped us cross the sea, And drowned our oppressors, Then Aaron would light the fire lights As Miriam sang through the nights Then we would cook our matzah Of which I'll share with you Our history is our purpose, So we've got to push on through Everything's gonna be all right...
-- Four Children Jewish Identity Contributed by Tom Koppel For centuries Jewish identity was synonymous with the Jewish religion. This began to change starting in the mid-17th century as movements for political rights and equality moved across Europe. Jews had more opportunities to interact with other cultures and communities, and as a result, ideas about religion and identity changed. As Jonathan Sarna writes, what made modern democratic society unique is voluntaryism, “the principle that individuals are free to choose their religious beliefs and associations without political, ecclesiastical or communal coercion.” Without the community telling Jews how to express their Judaism and with exposure to secular culture new forms of Jewish identity came about. These included a strictly cultural Jewish identity that removed religion from the equation and instead focused on the liberal and fine arts. Today, many Jews around the world identify with Judaism solely through cultural means. Jewish educators and community leaders have found ways to communicate values, set agendas, and organize constituencies through cultural mechanisms, thus infusing the cultural Jewish community with a strong self-identity separate from the traditional Jewish theology. Investing in Judaism’s rich cultural heritage doesn’t always mean a total divorce from religion. Many Jews are customizing their investment in Judaism, coming up with communities and organizations for everything from Jewish vegans, to Jewish pacifists, to Jewish parents with autistic children. Even the appearance of Jews has changed, as multiracial families become a larger segment of the Jewish community, integrating Korean, Chinese, Ethiopian and many other backgrounds into the Jewish mix. Life context has become a major factor in how people choose their communities and affiliations. Some single people may join communities in order to find partners. Young parents may decide they want to send their children to Jewish schools, and seniors may join synagogues or Jewish community centers in order to attend classes and activities with other retirees. Israel and Zionism have added another spoke to the wheel of Jewish identity, with many Jews associating mainly or partially with Israel. Visiting Israel can elicit strong feelings of loyalty and obligation to the land of the Bible. Many Jews around the world see Israel as the ultimate guarantor of the Jewish people’s survival, and are driven by a deep commitment to the idea of Israel. How do you define your Jewish identity? What do you accept of the traditional Jewish identity? What do you reject? How do you see yourself in terms of the five sons? How about your children? Your grandchildren? What is the value of diversity in Jewish practices and what is lost? What will Judaism look like in 3 or 4 generations? Will Judaism exist in 3 or 4 generations? Why, or why not?
-- Four Children The Good Place - 4 Children Contributed by Leslie Wasserman Source:
-- Four Children The Four Janets Contributed by Esther Kustanowitz Source: https://www.jweekly.com/2019/04/11/pop-culture-can-enrich-the-seder-but-mrs-maisel- is-a-gimmick/ The Four Children seems to suggest that there are four types of people and four ways to approach Jewish study. But that template also serves for robust discussions and interpretations: How do we define any of these categories? Is there wisdom in silence or in intellectual challenge? Is simplicity and lack of intellectual curiosity a form of wickedness? As I was about to tackle the four main characters on NBC's life-after-death sitcom “The Good Place” in a Four Children context, I came across a graphic that had taken the first step. It designates moral philosophy professor Chidi as wise, self-proclaimed “Arizona trashbag” Eleanor as wicked, socialite Tahani as simple, and dim Darwin Award winner Jason Mendoza as the one who doesn’t know how to ask.
In really thinking about these characters, I realized that Eleanor is wise enough to figure out season one’s spoiler twist and lead the group onto a better path. And Chidi’s inability to make decisions could mark him as a wild card: Is a life without decisions simple? Does his inability to form constructive questions keep him in purgatory? Tahani doesn’t know how to ask a question that’s not about herself or relate to people who aren’t obscenely wealthy. And Jason — who constantly asks questions — is the one who sees life simply and happily. The boundaries are blurred. For me, “The Good Place” image that best represents this idea is from season three’s “Janet(s)” episode, in which actress D’Arcy Carden, who normally plays an omniscient, not-a-girl/not-a- robot, Siri-Alexa-esque character, plays all four of the main characters. (Why is complicated, but the result is brilliant--see image above.) Applied to the Four Children context, the four Janets represent a complex and nuanced inner life: four essences, four approaches to life. This image shows that the outside may seem the same, but internal character can’t always be discerned by looking at a person or hearing someone say a single sentence like “What does this mean to you?” Janets — and people —are much more complicated than that. (excerpted from "Pop culture can enrich the seder but the Maisel haggadah is a gimmick," by Esther D. Kustanowitz, in J.: The Jewish News of Northern California, April 2019)
-- Exodus Story Exodus Story - Drawing Activity Contributed by Made It Myself Books Source: Made It Myself Books
-- Exodus Story Matzah Humor Contributed by Kayli Pierson Source:
-- Exodus Story The Story of Passover (Script) Contributed by JewBelong Source: http://www.jewbelong.com/passover/ NARRATOR 1 (10 LINES) NARRATOR 2 (13 LINES) PHARAOH (15 LINES) SLAVE (2 LINES) HERALD (1 LINE) MOSES (8 LINES) GOD (7 LINES) PHARAOH’S SON (2 LINES) AARON (12 LINES) SHEEP (2 LINES) YOCHEVED (1 LINE) PRINCESS (4 LINES) PRINCESS’S ATTENDANT (4 LINES) MIRIAM (4 LINES) NARRATOR 1: The story of Moses and the Exodus from Egypt has been told thousands of times. It’s a reminder to the Jewish people that once we were slaves in Egypt, but now we are free. And so, this year, as in years before, generation upon generation, we tell the story of Passover. Now, I invite you to relax and listen to this tale. We begin in Pharaoh’s Palace. PHARAOH: Yes, I’ll have more grapes. This morning I took a tour of all of my new pyramids and I’m totally exhausted. SLAVE: Yes, your highness. I must tell you that as a slave, we are really doing a fine job at building those pyramids. Carrying bricks is just the discipline that my fourteen sons need. PHARAOH: Fourteen? Did you say fourteen sons? SLAVE: Indeed I did, your most fabulousness. PHARAOH: Leave my quarters. I’ve gotta think. This could be bad...really bad. I mean, I love having these Hebrew slaves, but there are just SO many of them! They are not Egyptians, and as shocking as it might be, I don’t think they even like me. What if there’s a war and they join my enemies and fight against me? I am going to try to find a way to decrease this Jewish-Hebrew slave population. HERALD: Hear ye, hear ye. It is hereby decreed by Pharaoh, ruler of the land of Egypt, that any son born to a Jew is to be drowned in the Sea of Reeds.
ALL: NOOOOOOO!!!!! NARRATOR 2: Our story continues at the banks of the Nile River, where we meet Yocheved, a Jewish woman with a newborn son. YOCHEVED: (distraught) Oh no! Did you hear about Pharaoh’s awful decree? I knew he was mean, but now he’s killing our babies?! I need to hide my beautiful baby boy. NARRATOR 2: So Yocheved wove a basket of reeds, which is another word for long bamboo- like sticks, put her son into it and hid it in the tall grass by the river. She then sent her young daughter Miriam to hide nearby and keep watch. The Pharaoh’s daughter, who was a princess, eventually came down to the water to bathe and heard cries coming from the river. PRINCESS: What is this? PRINCESS’S ATTENDANT: It appears to be a baby, your highness. PRINCESS: A baby? PRINCESS’S ATTENDANT: Why, yes, your highness. NARRATOR 2: She pulled the baby out of the water. PRINCESS: Oh, it must be one of those Jewish babies that my dad, the Pharaoh, wants to kill. But look at this little guy. He seems so beautiful and innocent. I know, I’ll take him home and raise him as my son. He will love me and respect me as his mother. PRINCESS’S ATTENDANT: As you wish. MIRIAM: (as she comes out of her hiding place) Excuse me, your majesty, but would you like me to call a Hebrew woman to nurse the baby, so that your attendant can continue to tend to you instead of being distracted by the baby? PRINCESS: Good idea. I hadn’t thought of that. All right, your Hebrew woman may nurse my child, and when he is old enough to walk, she shall bring him to the palace for me to raise. I am going to name him “Moses,” which means “drawn from the water.” PRINCESS’S ATTENDANT: Whatever you say, your majesty. NARRATOR 1: And so Yocheved’s son, Moses, grew up as the Pharaoh’s adopted grandson, with all the riches and prestige that such a position entailed. But when he was young, Yocheved told Moses that he was Jewish, so he always had great compassion for the Hebrew slaves. One day, he came upon an Egyptian guard beating an old Jewish slave. Moses got so angry that he killed the guard. Of course, by doing so he was breaking the law. He feared the consequences, so he ran away ran away from the palace into the desert, and became a shepherd. That where we pick up the story now.
SHEEP: Baaaa NARRATOR 2: One fine morning, one of Moses’s sheep strayed a bit from the path. SHEEP: I said, “Baaaa!” NARRATOR 2: Moses followed the sheep and came across a burning bush. It was the craziest thing. This green bush was on fire, but instead of burning up and getting all crinkled and then black, it stayed green. This was, of course, a miracle. It was God, getting Moses’s attention so that he could talk to him. It worked. GOD: Moses! Moses! MOSES: Here I am. GOD: I am the God of thy father, the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac and the God of Jacob. I have seen the affliction of my people in Egypt and have heard their cry. I have come to deliver them out of the hands of the Egyptians, and to bring them out of that place unto a good land, flowing with milk and honey. Now, Moses, I need you to go back to Pharaoh and tell him to let the Jews go free and then you will need to lead the Jews out of Egypt. NARRATOR 1: It’s important to know that Moses stuttered whenever he spoke, so he was always nervous to speak in public. MOSES: B-b-but why should… I mean, why, why should I be the one t-t-to lead m-m-my people? GOD: Fear not – I will be with you. MOSES: Whah-what shhhould I t-t-t-ell the p-p-people? GOD: Just tell the Children of Israel, also known as the Jews, also now known as the slaves, that they need to listen to you, because you speak for me. Tell them to leave their homes and everything they have always known and follow you to the wilderness. MOSES: That is c-c-c-c-crazy. They’ll n-never l-listen and besides, I am s-s-s-s-s-low of s-s-s- p-p-peech and s-s-s-s-low of t-t-tongue. GOD: You’re right, it will not be easy. I forgot to mention Pharaoh is not going to simply agree to let his slaves go free. He will take some convincing, and it will not be pretty. MOSES: Puh-puh-puh-please send s-s-s-someone else… GOD: Your brother Aaron speaks well, right? He will have to help. I will only speak to you, but you can tell Aaron what I said, and he can be the one who speaks to Pharaoh and the people.
NARRATOR 2: And so Moses and Aaron went to the people of Israel and convinced them that God had spoken to Moses. Then they went to see Pharaoh at the palace. AARON: Pharaoh, we are here to demand, in the name of our all-powerful and all-knowing God, that you release the Hebrew people from bondage. PHARAOH: LOL. That is really amusing, guys. So, Moses, back after all of these years to bring shame on your own house and your own grandfather? AARON: You cared for my brother for many years. At one time, he loved you as a grandfather. But he is the son of a Hebrew slave. If you love him, you will let his people go. PHARAOH’S YOUNG SON: Moses! I missed you! (Looks at Aaron.) Hey, who are you? AARON: I am Aaron, Moses’s brother. PHARAOH’S YOUNG SON: I thought I was his brother! AARON: Pharaoh, if you do not release the Hebrews, Egypt will be smitten with a greater plague than it has ever before seen. PHARAOH: There is no way I am going to do that! I don’t know this God you are talking about, and I will not let your people go. Now get out of my palace! NARRATOR 1: To punish Pharaoh for his refusal to let the Jews go, God turned the water of the Nile to blood. It was horrible. Everyone needs fresh water to live, and instead of water, the entire river ran red with blood. Pharaoh was furious, and he called Moses and Aaron back to the palace. PHARAOH: OK, this is horrible! The Nile River has turned to blood, and it’s your fault! Everyone is freaking out. Maybe your God is powerful after all. If I let your people go, will he turn the river back to water? AARON: Yes, of course. We don’t want to harm your people, we just want to leave and be free. PHARAOH: Fine, then go. NARRATOR 2: So Aaron and Moses left the palace and told the Jewish people to start getting ready for their journey. But then… PHARAOH: Get Moses and Aaron back here! AARON: Yes, Pharaoh? We were just leaving. PHARAOH: Not so fast. I realized that when you go I will have no one to build my pyramids. So I have hardened my heart and changed my mind. You need to stay.
MOSES: B-b-b-ut Pharaoh, m-m-m-ore terrible things will happen to the Egyptian people if you do not let us go! PHARAOH: I will take my chances. Now get out of my palace, and tell the Jews to get back to work! NARRATOR 2: Soon, Egypt was overrun with another of God’s plagues… frogs. Wherever you looked, there were frogs all over the land. As you can imagine, it was awful. So Pharaoh called Moses and Aaron back to the palace and told them he would now allow the Jews to leave Egypt. But when they were ready to leave, Pharaoh changed his mind again. This happened every time! NARRATOR 1: The next plague God sent was lice....people and animals all got lice. Then flies everywhere. Then cattle disease...so all the cows got sick and died, then boils… terrible blisters on everyone… then hail fell from the sky – big pieces of hail, as big as ping-pong balls. Then locusts, which ate the plants, including all of the crops. NARRATOR 2: So between the cattle disease, which ruined the meat, and the hail and locusts which wrecked the crops, Egypt was in bad shape. People were hungry. Then came the plague of darkness. The sun never rose, and people were frightened and cold. The plagues were spreading fear and sickness across Egypt. NARRATOR 1: But the crazy thing was, after each plague, Pharaoh would call Moses and Aaron to the palace and tell them that if their God made the plague stop, the Jews could leave Egypt. So God would end the plague, and then Pharaoh would harden his heart and change his mind, keeping the Jews in bondage. It was a mess! PHARAOH: Who is this God of yours? How is it that each of these plagues only affects the Egyptians and not the Hebrews!? Get out! AARON: Pharaoh, our God is all-powerful! We don’t know what we can do to make you see thatyou must give in. We’re warning you now that God has told Moses what the next plague will be. He’s going to kill the firstborn of every Egyptian household, including your youngest son. Pharaoh, don’t let this happen! Let my people go! PHARAOH: I do not know your God, and I will not let your people go. Get out of my house! GET OUT! NARRATOR 2: God then came to Moses and instructed him to have all the Jewish people slay a lamb and smear some of its blood on the doorposts of their houses and gates. Then, when the Angel of Death flew over Egypt, he took the lives of all of the firstborn, except for those in the homes marked with blood. Pharaoh’s own son died. It was devastating. The people of Egypt were mourning. Moses and Aaron went to Pharaoh yet again. AARON: Pharaoh, the grandfather my brother once loved, we are truly sorry for your loss.
PHARAOH: Go away! Go away and leave me to my grief! AARON: But Pharaoh, now that you have seen how powerful God is, will you let my people go? PHARAOH: Be gone already! You and your people! You have ruined my empire. NARRATOR 1: So Aaron and Moses left Pharaoh and went to the Jews. AARON: Listen to me everyone! Remember this day, when you were able to leave Egypt, we were slaves and now we are going to be free and God will guide us out of here to the Promised Land. MOSES: We m-m-m-must go fast! We must m-m-m-make food, but… but… we must go before… before… Pharaoh changes his mind again. AARON: He won’t change his mind. Not this time. MIRIAM: Moses, if we leave right now, the bread won’t have time to rise. MOSES: F-f-f-forget the bread, let’s go! NARRATOR 2: Most of the Jews went with Moses and Aaron. But some felt the whole idea of leaving their homes and going some unknown land was crazy, so they stayed in Egypt. But meanwhile… PHARAOH: I have just let my slaves all go. This is not good for the people of Egypt. All that my forefathers have worked for will vanish if I lose the Hebrew slaves. Who will build the cities? The entire economy of Egypt will collapse. It will be the end of an empire. I WANT THEM BACK! NARRATOR 1: So once again, Pharaoh had hardened his heart. He got his army together and went after the Jews. Because they were walking and had a lot of kids with them who were slow walkers, the Jews had only gotten a few miles away from Egypt and they were really close to the Red Sea. MIRIAM: Look! The Egyptians are coming! They will kill us all! They will work us to death! Moses, do something! AARON: Don’t be afraid. God has handled things for us before, and I don’t think he would have made all those plagues just to have us die at the edge of the Red Sea now. NARRATOR 2: Then God spoke to Moses. GOD: Moses! Lift thy rod and stretch out thy hand over the sea, and divide it; and the children of Israel shall go across the sea safely.
NARRATOR 1: It was amazing. When Moses raised his rod, the water of the sea parted, and the children of Israel walked across on the ground at the bottom of the sea. They were totally fine. But when Pharaoh’s armies followed to catch them, the waters closed in and Pharaoh’s armies were drowned. MIRIAM: That was a miracle! We made it across the Red Sea! I don’t know what God has in store for us next, but at last, we are free! NARRATOR 2: And Miriam took a timbrel – which is another word for a tambourine – in her hand; and all of the women went out after her with their timbrels and danced and sang. This kicked off a trek of forty years through the desert. NARRATOR 1: It was also when God starting sending manna, food from the sky that tasted like anything you wanted it to and sustained the Jews until they reached the Holy Land of Israel. But all of that is for another story. In the meantime, Happy Passover! THE END!
-- Exodus Story The Passover Story for Kids Contributed by PJ Library Source: PJ Library The first Passover happened long ago in the far-away country of Egypt. A mean and powerful king, called Pharaoh, ruled Egypt. Worried that the Jewish people would one day fight against him, Pharaoh decided that these people must become his slaves. As slaves, the Jewish people worked very hard. Every day, from morning until night, they hammered, dug, and carried heavy bricks. They built palaces and cities and worked without rest. The Jewish people hated being slaves. They cried and asked God for help. God chose a man named Moses to lead the Jewish people. Moses went to Pharaoh and said, “God is not happy with the way you treat the Jewish people. He wants you to let the Jewish people leave Egypt and go into the desert, where they will be free.” But Pharaoh stamped his foot and shouted, “No, I will never let the Jewish people go!” Moses warned, “If you do not listen to God, many terrible things, called plagues, will come to your land.” But Pharaoh would not listen, and so the plagues arrived. First, the water turned to blood. Next, frogs and, later, wild animals ran in and out of homes. Balls of hail fell from the sky and bugs, called locusts, ate all of the Egyptians’ food. Each time a new plague began, Pharaoh would cry, “Moses, I’ll let the Jewish people go. Just stop this horrible plague!” Yet no sooner would God take away the plague than Pharaoh would shout: “No, I’ve changed my mind. The Jews must stay!” So God sent more plagues. Finally, as the tenth plague arrived, Pharaoh ordered the Jews to leave Egypt. Fearful that Pharaoh might again change his mind, the Jewish people packed quickly. They had no time to prepare food and no time to allow their dough to rise into puffy bread. They had only enough time to make a flat, cracker-like bread called matzah. They hastily tied the matzah to their backs and ran from their homes. The people had not travelled far before Pharaoh commanded his army to chase after them and bring them back to Egypt. The Jews dashed forward, but stopped when they reached a large sea. The sea was too big to swim across. Frightened that Pharaoh’s men would soon reach them, the people prayed to God, and a miracle occurred. The sea opened up. Two walls of water stood in front of them and a dry, sandy path stretched between the walls. The Jews ran across. Just as they reached the other side, the walls of water fell and the path disappeared. The sea now separated the Jews from the land of Egypt. They were free! Each year at Passover, we eat special foods, sing songs, tell stories, and participate in a seder – a special meal designed to help us remember this miraculous journey from slavery to freedom.
-- Exodus Story Let My People Go (song) Contributed by Joseph Zitt Source: =Traditional When Israel was in Egypt’s land, Let My people go! Oppressed so hard they could not stand, Let My people go! Refrain: Go down, Moses, Way down in Egypt’s land; Tell old Pharaoh To let My people go! The Lord told Moses what to do, Let My people go! To lead the children of Israel through, Let My people go! You need not always weep and mourn, Let My people go! And wear these slav’ry chains forlorn, Let My people go!
-- Ten Plagues Dom, Dom Contributed by Gary Teblum Source: Dom, Dom, This Plague is Red (sung to the sung of Ding Dong, the Witch is Dead) (by Gary Teblum) Dom, Dom, this plague is red Which bad plague The bloody plague Dom, Dom, the plague of blood is red Pharoah – hear what I said Let them go, or you’ll be dead. Pharoah, the plague of blood is red. The Nile will turn to blood Oh no, that’s worse than flood Yo-ho, yo ho, yo ho Don’t cling, just let them all out. Dom, Dom, you’ll worry so Don’t ask why, just let us go. Don’t you know the plague of blood is red!
-- Ten Plagues
Skit - Pharaoh and Moses Go To A Conflict Counselor
Contributed by Dave Cowen
Source: Original
Pharaoh and Moses Go To A Conflict Counselor
by Dave Cowen
Conflict Counselor
So what brings you two in today?
Pharaoh
Honestly, things have been pretty rough.
Conflict Counselor
Moses, would you say that’s true?
Moses
I’d say it’s been rough but it doesn’t have to be anymore.
Pharaoh
I just don’t understand, you really don’t want to be my slaves anymore?Moses
No, we don’t.
Conflict Counselor
Pharaoh, what does it feel like to hear Moses say he and his people don’t want to be your slaves
anymore?
Pharaoh
You know, it really hurts. I feel like we’ve done some beautiful things together. I mean, we
couldn’t have built these pyramids if you weren’t our slaves. And those pyramids wouldn’t be a
wonder of the world for years to come if it wasn’t for what we built together.
Moses
But now it’s time for us to go.
Pharaoh
But I think there’s so much more we could still be and do together. We could keep building
wonders of the world. We could build a Great Wall or a Hanging Gardens. We could build a
Great Library. There’s a site in Alexandria that I think would be perfect for a Great Library.
Moses
But me and my people don’t want to do those things. We want to go to our homeland of Israel
Pharaoh
Ugh. This homeland. Always with this homeland. You think life’s going to be so much better in
this magical homeland? Well, I doubt it.
Moses
It’s got to be better than this.
Conflict Counselor
Moses, what happens for you when Pharaoh disregards your wish to go to Israel?
Moses
It’s more what happens to him. G-d’s going to keep plaguing him and his people.
Pharaoh
It’s the worst. First the water turned to blood. Then there were frogs and locusts. And so many
other things. So many things.
Moses
And yet you keep resisting what He’s telling you, which is that our relationship is over.
Conflict Counselor
Why do you keep resisting, Pharaoh?Pharaoh
My heart, it just feels hardened.
Conflict Counselor
Why do you think that is?
Pharaoh
Well, I think I saw Moses’s relatives Jacob and Joseph getting along so well with my Dad, the
previous Pharaoh, all those years, and honestly, I feel jealous. Like, why can’t I have that with
the Jews, too?
Conflict Counselor
And yet, you have the exact opposite.
Pharaoh
It’s true.
Conflict Counselor
Sometimes the best way to love someone is to let them go, Pharaoh.
Moses
This is your last chance. You saw what G-d just did to the first born.
Conflict Counselor
So what will you do, Pharaoh, will you let Moses and his people go?
Pharaoh
OK, Fine, fine, whatever, fine, OK, sure.
Conflict Counselor
That didn’t sound very sure.
Pharaoh
I’m sure. I am. I’m sure. Just go. Just go.
Conflict Counselor
And you won’t change your mind?
Pharaoh
As of this moment. As of this moment, I can promise I won’t change my mind.
Conflict Counselor
Moses, what would happen if Pharaoh changes his mind again?Moses
I don’t know. But I don’t think he wants to find out.
Pharaoh
So this concludes our counseling?
Conflict Counselor
I guess it does. If you think this is a real sea change for you, Pharaoh. Do you agree, Pharaoh,
that this a real sea change for you?
Pharaoh
I believe it is.
Conflict Counselor
Do you agree, Moses?
Moses
We’ll see what happens to the sea.-- Cup #2 & Dayenu dayeinu graph Contributed by TANYA JOSELOWSKY Source: www.funnyordie.com
-- Cup #2 & Dayenu We're Gonna Sing Dayenu (Sing to tune of We Didn't Start the Fire) Contributed by Eli Garfinkel Source: Rabbi Eli Garfinkel We’re Gonna Sing Dayenu Start the Torah, Genesis, Ark, Noah, what a mess Babel’s Tower, God has power, Abraham let’s go, Sarah’s barren, can’t have children, Isaac isborn, try to kill him, Sarah’s Dying, Isaac’s crying, Rivka is hisbeau Esau’s tricked, too bad, birthright sold, brother’s blessed, Beth El, to find a wife, andthen Jacob marries twice Rachel’s hotter, Leah’s first, Twelve sons, it could be worse Joseph’s dreaming, brothers hate him, throw him down there, goodbye We’re gonna sing Dayenu It’s the song we’re learning While the brisket’s burning We’re gonna sing Dayenu They may really hate us But God always saves us Joseph Viceroy, save the food, new king, he hates the Jews Boys in river, gave us shivers, Moses kills a dude Bush flames, God exclaims, Save my people, can’t lose Ten plagues, they’re mad, Egypt chases hard, Cross Sea, we’re free, now the story really starts Eating manna, it’s God’s will, Moses tarries, calf is built God’s rage, burns bad, broke the tablets, shattered them, We get grace, saving face, let’s all say Baruch Hashem! We’re gonna sing Dayenu It’s the song we’re learning While the brisket’s burning We’re gonna sing Dayenu They may really hate us But God always saves us Get the law, write it down, oral Torah, don’t you doubt Mishkan, build it right, don the robes of holy might Vayikra, Kohanim, they were holy, served the Name Holiness and sacred rites, oh that must have been a sight. . . Count ‘em up, sent spies, so evil, they were fools Fringes rule, Korah, all his posse in a hole Red Cow, rock and staff, Bilaam’s curse, a talking ass Ba’al Peor, kills two more, Moses honors Phineas
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